The word: "schizophrenia" triggers negativity in anybody with any knowledge of the word's portrayal in media, popular thinking about it or else experiences with it.
Since being diagnosed in 1996, I have thought of the word: "schizophrenia," first thing every day and throughout the days, months and years until today, seventeen years later.
Until 1996 when diagnosed "schizophrenia," I think that I may have heard the word: "schizophrenia," once in my life as a kid in a school locker room.
I have not missed but two appointments with a doctor or nurse since 1996. I missed the two appointments due to mitigating circumstances. Nobody can call me late for a doctor's appointment!
(A reason for my being steadfast in consulting medical professionals is that I do not want to ever again experience what I experienced in 1996 when I did not sleep for a month after reading the Old Testament night and day for a year through to the Book of Malachi where it states: "therefore, thou shalt not deal treacherously with the wife of thy youth."
I was literally scared shit less of my own shadow by 1996 with no contact to anybody since 1993 where I was living in the back of a truck locking myself in a university library for twelve hour days reading and writing. I lost my "voice" and "nerve" in 1996 when diagnosed and have only begun to regain my "voice" through writing).
However: every morning since 1996 when diagnosed, I have thoughts of the word, "schizophrenia" flitting through my mind, which triggers wretched feelings in me as to what that word, "schizophrenia" connotes to me as someone diagnosed with it, on relational levels in my life and in popular thinking about "schizophrenia," as broadcast by media of "schizophrenia."
77% of cross platform and cross genre media portrays "schizophrenia" in a negative light, such as violent or criminal; whereas, the actual percent of violent or criminal people diagnosed with "schizophrenia" in communities of the United States is 3%: a number corresponding to the number of violent or criminal offenders in general populations.
Yet, media portrays "schizophrenia" as "violent or criminal" in 77% of cross-genre, cross platform, depicted scenarios from news to sitcoms. Media shapes "popular thinking" in the public's eye about many world topics, "schizophrenia" being one.
Thus, there is a lot of misinformation surrounding "schizophrenia" and what it connotes to people's mindset about it and reactions to it when the word, "schizophrenia," is a topic.
Relationships are difficult for me to maintain with most people because people whom I meet or know think negatively about me in my experience due to knowledge of my diagnosis and they express it verbally and physically.
The word, "schizophrenia" invites negativity in no matter whose mind it is seeded because of ill informed, negative connotations, thinking and reactions to the word "schizophrenia" brought about by portrayal of it proliferated in media.
Personally, when I think of the word, "schizophrenia" as a person diagnosed with it for seventeen years of my life since 1996: the word evokes negative thoughts in me about me, which in turn cause me to experience wretched feelings of regret, anger, belittlement, suicide ideas, unhappiness, distress, anxiety, depression, despondence and a host of other negative feelings about myself.
For me: "schizophrenia" and what it connotes as far as my feelings and thoughts are affected by what the word connotes to me and by and large, a lot of people in my experience, is a "curse," like being in a nightmare of emotional and psychological negativity, day in and day out.
I pang daily to feel good about myself and to think positively or in positive affirmations, but I find that the world around me exudes negativity in myriad ways causing me to feel bad about poachers in Africa feeding cyanide to elephants for tusks to be ground down into powder aphrodisiacs on top of the negativity that the word "schizophrenia" evokes in me.
Knowledge of what it is that causes ails is the key to curing ails and a cure for me would be to feel good about myself in spite of "schizophrenia" or other negativity in the world. What thoughts and actions do I need to practice on a consistent basis in order to feel good about myself on a daily basis in spite of the way that thought of the word "schizophrenia" affects me?
"When life looks like a piece of shit, don't give up! Give a whistle and sing and dance ..."
Since being diagnosed in 1996, I have thought of the word: "schizophrenia," first thing every day and throughout the days, months and years until today, seventeen years later.
Until 1996 when diagnosed "schizophrenia," I think that I may have heard the word: "schizophrenia," once in my life as a kid in a school locker room.
I have not missed but two appointments with a doctor or nurse since 1996. I missed the two appointments due to mitigating circumstances. Nobody can call me late for a doctor's appointment!
(A reason for my being steadfast in consulting medical professionals is that I do not want to ever again experience what I experienced in 1996 when I did not sleep for a month after reading the Old Testament night and day for a year through to the Book of Malachi where it states: "therefore, thou shalt not deal treacherously with the wife of thy youth."
I was literally scared shit less of my own shadow by 1996 with no contact to anybody since 1993 where I was living in the back of a truck locking myself in a university library for twelve hour days reading and writing. I lost my "voice" and "nerve" in 1996 when diagnosed and have only begun to regain my "voice" through writing).
However: every morning since 1996 when diagnosed, I have thoughts of the word, "schizophrenia" flitting through my mind, which triggers wretched feelings in me as to what that word, "schizophrenia" connotes to me as someone diagnosed with it, on relational levels in my life and in popular thinking about "schizophrenia," as broadcast by media of "schizophrenia."
77% of cross platform and cross genre media portrays "schizophrenia" in a negative light, such as violent or criminal; whereas, the actual percent of violent or criminal people diagnosed with "schizophrenia" in communities of the United States is 3%: a number corresponding to the number of violent or criminal offenders in general populations.
Yet, media portrays "schizophrenia" as "violent or criminal" in 77% of cross-genre, cross platform, depicted scenarios from news to sitcoms. Media shapes "popular thinking" in the public's eye about many world topics, "schizophrenia" being one.
Thus, there is a lot of misinformation surrounding "schizophrenia" and what it connotes to people's mindset about it and reactions to it when the word, "schizophrenia," is a topic.
Relationships are difficult for me to maintain with most people because people whom I meet or know think negatively about me in my experience due to knowledge of my diagnosis and they express it verbally and physically.
The word, "schizophrenia" invites negativity in no matter whose mind it is seeded because of ill informed, negative connotations, thinking and reactions to the word "schizophrenia" brought about by portrayal of it proliferated in media.
Personally, when I think of the word, "schizophrenia" as a person diagnosed with it for seventeen years of my life since 1996: the word evokes negative thoughts in me about me, which in turn cause me to experience wretched feelings of regret, anger, belittlement, suicide ideas, unhappiness, distress, anxiety, depression, despondence and a host of other negative feelings about myself.
For me: "schizophrenia" and what it connotes as far as my feelings and thoughts are affected by what the word connotes to me and by and large, a lot of people in my experience, is a "curse," like being in a nightmare of emotional and psychological negativity, day in and day out.
I pang daily to feel good about myself and to think positively or in positive affirmations, but I find that the world around me exudes negativity in myriad ways causing me to feel bad about poachers in Africa feeding cyanide to elephants for tusks to be ground down into powder aphrodisiacs on top of the negativity that the word "schizophrenia" evokes in me.
Knowledge of what it is that causes ails is the key to curing ails and a cure for me would be to feel good about myself in spite of "schizophrenia" or other negativity in the world. What thoughts and actions do I need to practice on a consistent basis in order to feel good about myself on a daily basis in spite of the way that thought of the word "schizophrenia" affects me?
"When life looks like a piece of shit, don't give up! Give a whistle and sing and dance ..."
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